Today I'm feeling reflective. In my efforts to begin coherently compiling information for the C.A.M. information of the site, I've spent the last week sifting through notes from my graduate program and revisiting old books that have been collecting dusk on my book shelf. It has been a real mental exercise to take all the information I learned and apply that knowledge to breast health and breast cancer. I even reconnected with someone that I haven't spoken to 15 or more years to talk about acupuncture and Chinese medicine. Normal conversation stuff - like, the usual banter about stagnant liver Qi...
Speaking of stagnant - I've been feeling a lot of that lately, also cold, damp and dry, that sucks because it's a recipe for disease. I know I'm not the only one feeling this way. We can blame it on COVID. Unfortunately, as I niche myself further and further into the specialty of breast I begin to feel more and more stuck. Do you feel that way about your specialty or is it just a me thing?
Sheila had to take her general radiography test recently. While I narrowly escaped having to do that every 10 years for x-ray, it made me wonder how I would fare taking that test. I haven't taken a standard radiograph in over a year, part of me misses that. I haven't cracked open a book on Chinese medicine or really studied floral essences in years either. Part of me misses that part of me too.
Don't mistake me, I really like the work that I do. Even on those days I come home defeated I still like my job. Obviously I have some passion for this topic or I wouldn't be working on this website until 10 or 11 o'clock at night after working 8 hour days with patients, but it is adding to the stuckness.
Revisiting my educational material about integrative and alternative healing modalities just made me come face to face with how unhealthy I have permitted myself to become. I sit here in front of my screen for hours explaining breast health to who ever has stubbled onto this site. Breast health starts with general health. Perhaps the pandemic has been an excuse to not eat the best foods or exercise regularly, but that needs to stop.
Slowly I will make my way through all of the C.A.M. modalities that I am comfortable explaining. (If you know of something I'm missing, overlooking, etc. please let us know, I'd be happy to add it, even happier if you wrote it.) I am also going to start forcing myself to step away from this project for at least an hour a day to take care of me, mostly because I hate when I'm hypocritical.
This week I've been home and I've actually been do some physical activity. Yoga and Qi Gong and dancing around the house to music that is too loud. I feel more energized, I know that's the whole point, but I think it is the beginning of a shift. I'm ready. I've applied for a medical Qi Gong practitioner training course in Colorado and I have resolved to practice for at least 20 minutes daily without an excuse. My poor husband has become my practice buddy whether he wants to or not, I need to hold someone accountable to hold myself accountable.
If you are like me and you know you are not being the healthiest version of you then I implore you to make a change too. Go shake it!